Work, Anal Sex, Money, and Music I'm in a bad mood. My last set of films came out like shit, and I don't have time to pull more before Scott leaves for the Synchotron. He's running my samples, but if they're no good, what kind of data do you think he'll get? Whatever, he's just looking at conductance level, it shouldn't matter too much. But getting good crystallization has been a pain in the ass, since the diffractometer downstairs isn't good at getting film data, just powder data. I need to talk to Erik, but he's not in yet. I have to calcine my films, but since it takes 18 hours, I have to come in over the weekend in order to get them all done by Tuesday, when Scott leaves. I should go cut the films to size now. Bah. One of the people I work with, who is pretty much done with his degree and is just visiting for a few days to finish up things, said some things to another coworker who relayed them to me, unsurprisingly. They upset me. Specifically, he said that I leave work too early and that I am bringing down the meaning of grad school by working so few hours. No, I don't work 50-60 hours like most people. Or rather, I'm not here 50-60 hours, like most people. But when I'm here, I'm not browsing the Internet for hours (my 15 minutes on Diaryland notwithstanding), playing Warcraft III, going to eat every day for at least an hour, etc. I work. Fuckers. But even so, I don't feel confident that I get as much done as I would like. I can't fit it all in! I'm not sure what bothered me so much about his comment, if it's because I want people to think good thoughts about me, if I want to do a good job at graduate school, or (and this may be it), if it bothers me that maybe I am bringing down grad school. After all, if someone can do it working as little as I do, why doesn't everyone do it? Well, it's still hard work. All that aside, people slack off so much in this department it's not even funny. That's why UCLA is ranked 10th, not in the top five like MIT and Berkeley. I know a few people who left Berkeley with their masters, transferring here to get their PhD because the work load there was too insane. I think I would feel better if I could just talk to the guy about it, but the coworker who relayed the info doesn't want to be exposed for her gossip. Bah. I am trying to get here earlier. This morning, despite my baby boy keeping me up all fucking night, I was set to leave at 8:00, when my two year old woke up the boy who then wanted to nurse, during which I fell asleep for another hour. I try, okay? And if someone could please cure me of the worst acne I've ever had, puberty included, do so now! What the fuck is up with this? I'm 27, too old for this shit. And where did my sex drive go? I think with fondness of sex, how good it feels, etc, but I guess I've just been so tired at night I haven't done anything. That never stopped me before. Oh, let's talk anal sex. I have had it plenty, but not for a few years. I think about it sometimes, remember that I used to like it all right, but somehow I just don't really have the desire to go that way again. My husband is okay with that, so it's no problem. I think the issue is that poop is involved, that very word that makes me cringe. Eww. And it is involved, even if it is just to clean yourself out before hand. I guess I just like to maintain my distance from the poop. So, my husband and I were all set to take out a student loan to buy a new bike for me and a digital camera, among a few other choice items. I go online to accept the award for the 2003-2004 school year, but it's not there anymore because we waited too long to accept! We were punished for thinking over our purchases. As always, my procrastination bites me in the ass. I'm tired of all the electronica crap that Launch keeps picking out for me. Give me a break please! |