Thoughts on Child Support What is really going on with me? Logically I really see no reason to get child support. I think logically the thing would be to tell him I am really struggling, and could he pay for this, pay for that, maybe discuss setting aside money for Azaya, etc. That would answer the problems. It just seems crazy to go get the government to take someone's money away from them. It was set up for all those people who weren't getting assistance, and to be fair I haven't really tried to get much assistance. He said tonight that I could bitch to him about my financial situation, just like he bitches about his. And I told him that's not true at all, because if I mention anything at all he just says I chose to go to school and not get a real job, and that I chose to have more children, so I don't deserve to complain or get help. But somehow I thought there was value in getting a job that does something for your future, your enjoyment of the work that you do, and of course the eventual financial compensation that accrues with more schooling. My time in school is an investment into me, and as Azaya's mother he should be supporting that. You would think he would be willing to support me, and I would assume that if decided to go to school for physics, as he's talked about doing, then the situation would reverse itself. And maybe that comes to my real reason after all. Because I thought about it, and if the situation were reversed, and I were working and he was in school, then I could see him maybe wanting some child support. And I would give it. I don't think he'll want to do it for me, and he doesn't. $300/month for 10 years is more than $30,000, and he'll spend that on the attorneys just to prevent having to give money to some woman who left him. And I guess he has no plans at this point to return to school anyway; he just talked about it in the past. I have no idea if what I'm doing is right. I could think about it so long and never come to any decision. Part of me feels it's wrong to try to get child support in this way, but part of me feels I would support him if he needed it and I were making money, and maybe one day he'll need it again. Shouldn't we support each other? And if we stick with what the law is, we don't have to figure out ourselves the appropriate amount. Just fill out that little worksheet, and it's all there. Maybe you could read how they do the calculation and see if you agree morally with how they are ranking things. |